Do White Men Have An Easier Time Dating Online?

Posted May 2, 2013 by

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Or are they just racists?

First impressions can be a crucial factor when it comes to dating. If you meet someone on the street or in a bar face to face, their race might be an unconscious factor in how you might judge them. As far as online dating goes however, your match might be determined by a computer or some other disinterested party and you can go along with believing that you don’t have a racist bone in your body until you have to make a choice once you get a response. Without even realizing it, the statistics start to accumulate and your racist tendencies might start to come out. Thankfully, we have some revealing data about how this all works.

 The Hard Facts About Online Dating

Here’s a table measuring the rate in which women online get responses to messages that they send out online. In this case, green means that the percentage is greater than the average data, red is worse than average and yellow is exactly as the statisticians expect:

black_dating_site_statisticsNow what does this graph tell us? First of all, the obvious: women generally have an easier time when it comes to online dating. Not like that’s particularly newsworthy, I just thought I’d mention it since this graphic so clearly illustrates it. The other most striking thing about this graphic that jumps out at me is the low average response rate that black women get to their messages. More on that in a bit. First we should look at this graph’s counterpart, when men message women:

dating-site-racesWell what we can see here is that when it comes to men reaching out in the world of online dating, there’s an all round uphill climb for replies from the ladies. Again, that’s not really a surprise.

Now here’s where these two graphs get interesting in conjunction. Notice how when it’s the man sending out the initial message, white guys get the most responses back from women across the board. Likewise, based on the first graph, white men are the least likely to respond to messages that they receive from women no matter what race she is.  Is your average white man online getting so much attention that he can afford to ignore most of the messages that he receives from women? It would appear that he would be most likely to get a response to whomever he rights to.

Online Dating Is Tougher For Black Women

The other striking comparison comes with the state of online dating for black women. Like we saw in the first table, how black women are the least likely to get a response from men no matter what his race is, they also are the most likely to respond when they get a message from a man — above average in nearly every case. Are black women generally just nicer and more likely to acknowledge a message with a response, or do they have to work all that much harder to get attention in the increasingly competitive world of online dating?

Native American women are also likely to respond when messaged, but they don’t seem to have much of a problem getting messages from men though. Asian, hispanic, and white women are the least likely to respond to anyone in general, although if you’re a white man you’re at least the most likely to get a response from any of those picky groups. It would appear from the data that the most racist group might actually be white women more than white men, especially when looking at this chart here:


In this case, when people are asked whether they would be okay with dating someone of a different racial background than themselves, whites in general are the most resistant but white women are the only group that the majority says that they would strong prefer to date a white man. On the opposite end of the scale here, black men are the least likely to say that they would strongly prefer to date someone of their own race, but as far as these statistics go, we can’t tell whether that makes them the most tolerant of all races or just uninterested in black women. Again, more evidence that online dating is tougher for black women.

What Have We Learned?

It would appear that if you’re a white man: congratulations! You have it the easiest, so easy in fact that you can afford to ignore messages from many interested women. Maybe it’s because you’re really that desirable or many it’s because your fellow white women aren’t interested in anyone else. In any case, you would appear to have the most options and interest online.  Black women, on the other hand have it the most difficult and will, at least according to the statistics, be working the hardest in the online dating world to get any attention. Breaking down the data even further, a white man who’s interested in dating a black woman should have the easiest time finding a date.




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About the Author

Paul Abbey
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Paul Abbey has a Masters Degree in Sexual Health from the University of Sydney in Australia. He has authored several self-help novels and has been a guest speaker in four Continents and many different cities from around the world. At, Abbey is the leading authority in human sexuality and he strives to help shape the dating community into a more relevant and understanding place for both men and women.