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Love Letters. Bring Them Back.

Posted February 28, 2011 by

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I just read an online dating stat that made me nostalgic for the days of snail mail (not that I was really around for many of those days). According to a survey reported in The Telegraph, only one in eleven people has ever written a love letter.

Oh sadness. Love letters are important.

Now, the survey seems to define a love letter as a paper and ink deal, which, in my opinion, isn’t very fair. A love letter can be electronic. A lot of folks are under the impression that one can not labor over an electronic letter, but this is so far from the truth. I have written and received many, many a love letter in my day. I even have a folders in my email account marked “Letters from M.” or “Letters from J.” or whatever. Correspondence between the infatuated is an incredible thing.

Letters of infatuation need not be cheesy. There is no need for ‘my dear’ or ‘my love’ or comments about her infinite beauty or her eyes. You can find extremely cynical ways to express you affection for another person. You can acknowledge your resistance to sentiment and all the unwelcome ways it shows up in your life despite this resistance. This is, in fact, why love letters and romance in general are so effective these days; everyone is cynical, no one believes in love or romance. No one believes in anything. No one even really believes in online courting. Thus, when they finally find themselves swept up in some sort of burning passion, and everyone does, at some point, they are all the more taken by it. They know it’s just the drugs in their brain that facilitate pair bonding for the sake of offspring, but it’s pretty sweet anyways. Love letters are a celebration of those crazy chemicals in your brain, and they are something you can hold on to long after you’ve decided that looking at each other’s face makes you want to vomit.

Because the sentiment still exists on paper, or on the Gmail server, even if it does not exist between the two of you anymore. And I think that is definitely something worth holding on to.



About the Author

Paul Abbey
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Paul Abbey has a Masters Degree in Sexual Health from the University of Sydney in Australia. He has authored several self-help novels and has been a guest speaker in four Continents and many different cities from around the world. At Onlinedatingstats.com, Abbey is the leading authority in human sexuality and he strives to help shape the dating community into a more relevant and understanding place for both men and women.